Episode 12: Wrecking ball
Published: December 6, 2019
Loved ones visit Fiji, but only for the powerful. Noura gives a rant for the ages. An underdog alliance goes up in flames as Dean leaks the plan, and Karishma's ninth life is finally snuffed. And Ryan Kaiser attempts to sift through the wreckage for signs of life.
Episode 11: This bitch bit my finger
Published: November 30, 2019
As a compromised Survivor season staggers on, Ryan tries to focus on the positive: Lauren's idol-winning bet, Noura somehow selflessly winning immunity, and Karishma's big idol play. Also Detective Dean's half-baked obfuscation.
Episode 10: The answer is no
Published: November 22, 2019
After the previous week's harrowing circumstances, Ryan runs through an episode that tries to pretend nothing major happened. Which dampens any thought of celebrating what would otherwise be exciting events in this one.
Episodes 8 & 9: Standing up for what was right
Published: November 15, 2019
As the once outstanding Island of the Idols season takes a dark, grim turn at the merge, Ryan sets aside the jokes for a week to ponder what went wrong, what needs fixing, and to praise those who stood up for what was right.
Episode 7: You want to pull some crazy s***?
Published: November 8, 2019
Ryan praises and guides you through a second straight spectacular, character-driven, socially relevant episode of Survivor, which as a bonus also featured abundant flashy gameplay and strategic insights ... almost all of it by women. Plus a salute to Rudy Boesch.
Episode 6: Ain't scared of no fight
Published: November 1, 2019
Ryan revisits the high-pressure Tribal that could have gone to rocks, or featured an Aaron flip, but instead deployed a key advantage and an ex-Vokai missing the merge. With lots of juicy stakes, heartfelt 'real talk' conversations, and chicken decapitation reactions along the way.
Episode 5: Orange is dead
Published: October 26, 2019
Ryan takes a minute to relax, with his face full of sand, reflecting on the state of the game in this interlude of an episode: largely Noura-free (and Island of the Idols-free), lots of Karishma, too much Applebee's, and everyone scrambling to distance themselves from old Lairo.
Episode 4: The Noura TV show
Published: October 18, 2019
Ryan is here at this place and time to remind you all that if you live in the present and visualize success, dreams can come true, such as getting to see Noura visit Island of the Idols, then run her tribemates into trees. Also Lairo pulled off another blindside.
Episode 3: A couple steps too far
Published: October 11, 2019
Cracks, cuts and covert operations were abundant in the Lairo tribe this week, and Ryan is here to praise some, bury others, and curiously cheer still others? In-dean.
Episode 2: Parvati 2.0
Published: October 4, 2019
Ryan revisits another episode of Island of the Idols where the women did everything: start fires, find idols, win idols, yell at their tribes, fall off ladders, arrange coups, and of course, get voted out. And always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom.
Episode 1: What is this place?
Published: September 27, 2019
Come, stare in slack-jawed wonder as Ryan Kaiser replays for you the events of the season premiere of Island of the Idols. Events you have seen before, but will still amaze you in their level of Janet stanning and Idol (mostly Sandra) worship.
Published: September 23, 2019
The True Dork Times writers (Ben Martell, Dan Otsuki, Pat Ferrucci, Ryan Kaiser, and Jeff Pitman) congregate and try to pick the winner of Survivor: Island of the Idols based on almost zero evidence. But that's no reason to avoid making what are probably ludicrously inaccurate hot takes.
Pre-season: Island of the Idols cast assessment
Published: September 16, 2019
With barely a week and a half left until the premiere, Ryan is eager to get rolling with Island of the Idols, and, armed mostly with their CBS bios, has put together a brisk run-down of which new castaways among the cast may soon have their own giant wooden head statues.
Ryan Kaiser has been a lifelong fan of Survivor since the show first aired during his days in elementary school, and he plans to one day put his money where his mouth is by competing in the greatest game on Earth. Until that day comes, however, he'll stick to running his mouth here and on Twitter: @Ryan__Kaiser