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Episode 9
"The Chain"
Days 25-27: Nov. 28-30, 2002
Airs: April 10, 2003





Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road

    So we've made it through nine weeks of MTV's Fraternity Life vs. Sorority Life: The Amazon. Whoops, that's not right. This is CBS's Survivor: The Amazon, and our previous mistaken analogy is far too insulting to the shallow, egotistical and resoundingly dull inhabitants of the MTV shows. Normally, this is where you'd see our whimsically bitter rants at the lameness of Mark Burnett's machinations and misdirection. But to be honest, this show is no longer good enough to be funny, nor is it funny enough to be good. It's just there, laying stinking on your TV every Thursday.
    Still, you're probably wondering what happened on Episode 9, since attempted viewing of it most likely lulled you into a coma. Assuming you've regained consciousness, here are the, uh... "highlights":

"Come on Probst, just give me the check so we can all go home. Okay?"
"Dude, Jenna, you've definitely gotta try the brownies...."
"Okay, God. I've rolled my sleeves up like Dave. Will you please let Heidi sleep with me now?"
"Oh Lord, Probst is talking again. Just... shoot... me...."
"Umm, this is how you spell 'Rob,' right?"
 
   
    But really, we would be remiss in not reporting the Ironic Quote of the Week, delivered by, you guessed it, Heidi Strobel: "My strongest assets to this group are athletic ability and intelligence." (Private hint to Heidi: "asset" is generally used in the sense of "something I'm good at." Oh, and we noticed Rob was staring at your two biggest assets while you were saying this. You might want to review the tape. To do so, you'll need to use the button with the arrow that points to the left. No, your other left. Oh, never mind).

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